Sunday, July 28, 2013

Re-arranged my bedroom today to the exact way I had it nearly two years ago when almost everything in my life was different than it is now. Even me. Especially me. I didn't even try to, and, to be honest, it really made me distressed when I first realized what I did. Now, sitting in my bed, there will be small moments while I sit here and edit photos, where I feel like I am 20 years old again. Like nothing has changed. No time as passed. But then, I rub my eyes, I see how much time has passed... and I wonder what I've done with it. It's not that I've done nothing. I've done many somethings. Many lovely somethings with lovely people. It's what I haven't done that lets me down the most. I'm tired of running myself in circles. My choices are making my life a culdesac, with memories and days on repeat, circling. I'm not going to go anywhere if I keep my steering wheel on the same continuous curve the rest of my life. Where have my dreams gone? Feeling low tonight.

Sunday, July 14, 2013

you're chasing shadows only to remain in the darkness